How to Practice Self-Compassion

December Theme of the Month:

Self-Compassion 

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What is Self-Compassion?

We all have moments when we beat ourselves down, criticizing ourselves for our mistakes and ruminating on the ways we have fallen short of our expectations. In these times of shame and struggle, self-compassion practices can help remind us that we are inherently “enough.”

 

At its core, self-compassion is unconditional love turned inwards. For many of us, it is much easier to feel and express compassion for others we see struggling and in pain. We jump to comfort our friends when they are struggling with difficulties, but we are often very tough on ourselves. The practice of self-compassion involves noticing when you are struggling, being kind to yourself during those moments, and recognizing that everyone struggles and makes mistakes. he acronym RAIN is an easy -to-remember tool for practicing mindfulness and compassion using the following four steps:

Recognize what is going on;

Allow the experience to be there, just as it is;

Investigate with interest and care;

Nourish with self-compassion

As Kristen Neff says, “With self-compassion we give ourselves the kindness and care we’d give to a good friend.” It’s important to realize that self-compassion is not self-pity, self-indulgence, or self-esteem.

 

What are the three components of self-compassion?

  1. Self-kindness (versus self-judgment)
  2. Common humanity (versus isolation)
  3. Mindfulness (versus over-identification)

 

How can I practice self-compassion?

  • Take a self-compassion break

            When you become aware of physical and mental discomfort due to self-critical thoughts

and emotions, consider putting down whatever you are doing to take a mental break. Practice saying to yourself:

  1. This is a moment of suffering. This hurts. --evoking mindfulness
  2. Suffering is a part of life. Other people feel this way, too. I am not alone. -- evoking common humanity
  3. I will be kind to myself. .. I will forgive myself. . I will learn to accept myself as I am. --evoking kindness

            Repeat these phrases until you believe them and you have regained your sense of

balance.

 

  • Guided meditations

Check out our online and in-person guided meditation resources at the Mind Body Labs Links to an external site. around UT Austin in the SSB and SAC. Guided meditations focused on self-compassion can also be found at self-compassion.org.

 

  • Keep a self-compassion journal

            Keep a daily journal in which you recall events during the day that caused you to feel

pain, shame, or any other emotion related to self-judgment or suffering. Recall the three components of self-compassion, and relate them to the emotion at hand. With practice, this will allow you to process the events of your day in an increasingly compassionate way.

 

  • Complete the Self-Compassion module on the Thrive UT app

Thrive UT is a free phone app that strives to enhance the well being all of UT students. Download Thrive UT and check out the module for Self-Compassion to learn more about ways to integrate self-compassion in your daily life.

 

For more self-compassion techniques, visit self-compassion.org.

 

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Sources:

http://self-compassion.org/ Links to an external site.

Thrive App